What exactly does that mean anyway? That for a 50-year-old I don’t look like I should cover my face with a burka? That I won’t scare any children with my droopy eyelids and hormone lined-lips? I mean really? What does it mean? Is it a compliment?

I remember years ago when I was 30-how can I even remember that far back? – and a 20-something twit said, “Wow, I hope I look as good as you when I’m YOUR age.” Well, that really fried my ass because I looked good then- no matter my age. So I turned to her and replied- “Honey, you don’t even look this good now!” Mean I know but what the hell.

I’m so tired of seeing photos of women my age such as Madonna who I know works her butt off but STILL her photos are photo-shopped to the point of disbelief. And it’s stupid. And it makes the rest of us go, “What the hell is wrong with me?” If I buy one more beauty product I’ll have to get an extra bathroom.

I found a photo-shopped magazine cover of Faith Hill on jezabel.com— check it out. Faith looks great before but of course damn PERFECT after the brush. It’s really starting to piss me off. I don’t have time to work out 6 hours a day and prepare perfect low-cal meals for myself. And if you have time to do all that then you need to pick up a GD book and start reading or volunteer for charity. I’m just saying. Apparently I am a cranky old woman this morning so I will read the paper about thousands dying in a cyclone and houses being foreclosed (Not mine yet!) and try to cheer the hell up.